Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Thankful. Humbled.

You know what? My life is perfect.

It really is.

Does that mean that I am deliriously happy? No. Does that mean that I still feel those lovey-dovey feelings every time I look at my husband? Not necessarily. Does that mean that my house is huge and I can afford to pay someone to clean it? Not at all. Does it mean that my kids are perfect and make their beds every morning without being asked and never argue nor get on my nerves? Uh... yeah, right. Does it even mean that we are wealthy and can afford to adopt internationally during a recession without sacrifice?

...oh, I'm sorry. I just had to stop typing and laugh out loud.

But still, my life is perfect.

I have a husband who really loves me and works so hard to provide for our family. I have an adorable (if tiny) house that I really like. I have two sons who I really think are pretty close to perfect. I have a wonderful community around me. I have friends who really get me and know everything there is to know about me and who inexplicably love me anyway. My parents are healthy. My brothers are awesome. I have everything I need. I have a Savior who never tires of picking me up no matter how often I fall down.

My life is perfect.

I need to give more of it away.

"When someone has been given much, much will be required in return; and when someone has been entrusted with much, even more will be required." Luke 12:48

Why have I been blessed with this life? Why do I get to adopt a precious little girl while her Ethiopian mommy doesn't get to raise her? Why are so many in this world unable to give their children a drink of clean water while I have already purchased Christmas presents for my children and hidden them in my closet? Why all the injustice?

Obviously there are no answers. No easy ones, anyway. But one thing I do know: I wasn't blessed with this great life just to keep it to myself. It wasn't given to me so that I could have a great shoe collection (which I do) nor so that my kids could have the latest video gaming system (which they do) nor so that my family could fill our house with everything we need and then some (which we do). I was blessed with this great life so that I could give it away.

I'm thankful for what I have... but also humbled by it. I need to give more away. Not just my stuff. I need to give more of myself away too.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Really beautiful, Gayla.
(I'm telling the boys where to look for their presents.)
Jewel

J Gutwein said...

I have been feeling a lot of these feelings & Luke 12:48 is my husband & I's marriage verse (if there is such a thing). So thanks for writing this down. Love, J

Sohailah said...

Great thoughts, good words, thanks.

Heidi Jo said...

i feel so much the same. i would probably choke on the word, 'perfect'...as it implies so much that i feel i am not---but i completely get the heart of your post.

i love my life. and i love the way God uses me in it.

Selam! G'day! Hello!